November

I love this month! I feel like I'm growing more and more.

The soul grows if you let it. Let your heart and mind open up to any adventure that will come. Although there are many things that still are not 100% the way I want them I feel that I keep taking baby steps to move forward. "Never look back, never surrender" don't know where I heard this
quote.

One thing I really dislike is people that are board with there lives. Even if CT is not exotic or what you want don't let it take the best of you. Where ever, who ever you are just have fun.

Be yourself !!!

Rush

Sometimes I feel like there is an avalanche rolling down on me. I run from place to place. Doing everything I enjoy and all I must do. I forget to breath and then the wind hits me, to remind me that I live.

I have never been one to not have something going on. I heard someone say "do something". That thought never crossed my mind, because I just do it. Some people may think, I think to much or want to do to much. I seem to be full of ideas and thoughts, but why not? We live one life. Only one, and if I get to try as much as I can; I will be satisfied.

I may not travel much or do things like skydive, but I do what I want. I dance, sing, love, cry, laugh, eat and just savor life. Even if Connecticut is not China, Japan, Paris, Italy, Mexico or anywhere exotic. You get one chance to be the best, do your best, want the best; even if sometimes you forget to breath.

Stop being board with life. Stop wishing for someone's else's opportunities. Just do what you can to make yourself happy. Even if there are obstacles. If not today tomorrow. Take a walk, leap, or skydive.

I have always tried to get what I want. I don't know how not to. But the only thing I wish I did not do, has been done. I fell in love with you. Now I don't know how not to. This is when I do wish the avalanche would actually hit me. It would just be done. Instead, all I do and want is to love you.

Conflict

Conflict

He loves her
He loves me

His with me
Not with her

She damaged him
She gave him everything and took it away
She left her mark and he can't forget

He walks into my life and in a moment he has imprinted his presences
In a single moment I have fallen

He gives me what I think I want but really he shortchanges me

Have I become his stepping stone?
Have I made up the words and photographs in my mind?

Like the snow
White, wet, solid, soft, pretty, almost harmless, a storm that takes it all
His tenderness
The lifeless fire, I desire to ignite

He will never love me
I will never get him

Or who knows? The story has not ended
Oh, but there is still that conflict

All I could learn

All the things I could be better at...

If I could write better I would

To be able to spell without spellcheck would be nice

To have read all the classics would be like a million bucks

To work at the top of a skyscraper with the view of the sea would make me melt

To have traveled to far, far, far away places would be an experience

Falling for Prince Charming would have been the end of my fairytale

To have never met you would have been a tragedy

If I could be better at not loving you, I would

Except, I don't ever want to learn that